"Parenting is a joyful, loving, wonderful, but hard gig"
Why you need to take care of yourself if you want to take care of your children. And how you can become better at managing your own emotions.
My son went to bed last night with a fever of about 40°C (about 104°F).
This morning he woke up feeling fine, with no fever.
But now, as I am writing this, his fever is back.
At least not as high as it was.
Having children is stressful. It is great, but no-one can deny that each of your children adds another source of stress to your life.
When I spoke to Dr Rosina McAlphine for my book "How To Get Kids To Listen", she described this perfectly:
I'd say to any parent on the planet, being a parent myself and working with thousands and thousands and thousands of parents over many years, "Parenting is a joyful, loving, wonderful, but hard gig."
Dr Rosina McAlpine
Because parenting is so stressful, it is critical that we as parents remember to take care of ourselves. It is too easy to get caught up in our children's needs, and forget about our own.
The truth is, the better we take care of ourselves, the better we are able to take care of our children. If we are stressed, tired, and emotional, then it is not just us that suffer, but also our children.
When I asked Dr Rosina what she thinks parents should know, she said:
One of the things that I think is the most important for parents is self-care. And the reason why I say that is, the more joy, the more happiness, the more health a parent has, the kinder, more empathic, the more loving, the more patient the parent is.
We've got to get rid of this notion that self-care is selfish. Because in fact, when we take care of ourselves, we are the best version of ourselves. For me, for my family, for my community, for my partner, if I have one, for my workplace. So, the two-step process only works if the parent is in a good way and managing emotions as well.
Dr Rosina McAlpine
The better we become at managing our own wellbeing and emotions, the better our children will become.
In our interview, Dr Rosina shared a simple, two step process for teaching children to manage their emotions and solve their own problems.
However, you can also use this same two-step process to learn how to better manage your own emotions.
By practicing this process each day, not only will you become calmer and feel better, but your children will also learn from your example and become better at it themselves.
In my interview with Dr Rosina, she described how you can use this process for helping your children to manage their own emotions, as well as how you can use it yourself to manage your own emotions.
You can find the full interview with Dr Rosina McAlpine - The "two-step process" for helping kids learn to manage their emotions and solve problems - here.
Talk soon
Sue Meintjes
ExpertParentingAdvice.com